Beautiful Pregnancy Photoshoot Of Woman Expecting Quintuplets

Is't this adorable?, Normally i post just about Nigerian lifestyle and updates but today as i was having a nice internet walk through i found this miraculous did. It so shook and interested me that i just could not pass without sharing with my dear cribbers. 

Kimberly Tucci, is an Australian mother of two who had tried for 1 year to have another child. She got pregnant and visited the Doctors for a maternity check. When she got there, she got a huge surprise! She's having five babies at the same time!

Tucci wrote on her Facebook page, Surprised By Five:

“My suspicion of a possible multiple pregnancy grew due to the quick rise of the pregnancy hormone. I was excited at the possibility of twins but absolutely nothing on this earth could have prepared me for what happened next.” At her first ultrasound, the sonographer spotted multiple gestation sacks.

“The sonographer started to count ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, FIVE!” Tucci said. “Did I hear that correctly?? FIVE?? My legs start to shake uncontrollably and all I can do is laugh. The sonographer then told me the term for five is QUINTUPLETS!!”

There’s just a one in 55,000,000 chance of conceiving quintuplets naturally, which was happened in her case.

Tucci then called her husband, who quickly drove to the doctor’s office. She said:

“I could see the excitement in his face,” “He told me, ‘We can do this.’”
The couple are expecting four girls and one boy.

Clothes And Teddies For Quintuplets

Tucci’s pregnancy has been anything but easy but she says all five babies are healthy, and Tucci remains positive.

Credits:

This post was originally posted on Linda Ikeji's blog and composing attribute is well directed to her. Photos are also part of the post which was copied and edited from her blog.

Message:

Congratulations to Tucci who has just been blessed with five and may she gain strength to push them down to earth and also take good care of them.

And to all married women reading this post right may her testimony bring abundant babies for you. Amen.

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A New Mindset for a New Year

William Shakespeare wrote that “all the world’s a stage and all the men and women merely players.” How we define the parts we play shapes the daily drama of our lives. Are we puppets, dancing to someone else’s tune or actors with a dynamic sense of agency, creating new possibilities in our lives?

William Shakespeare

Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck has found that our sense of self and our success in life are related to our “mindset.” People with a “set mindset” are stuck in the status quo, believing that their intelligence cannot be changed, while those with a “growth mindset” believe that their intelligence increases as they embrace new challenges. 

Neuroscience research affirms a growth mindset, for our brains develop throughout our lives, growing new neural connections in response to stimulation. If you cannot use a new computer program or play a musical instrument today, regular practice will stimulate your brain to develop new connections. And after a series of clumsy attempts, suddenly one day it all comes together: you can do it. Stimulated by all that effort, your brain has formed new connections.

The two mindsets have appeared throughout history. In the Renaissance, both Martin Luther and John Calvin believed that all people had vocations. But Luther saw the world as set, with the social order created by God. if your father was a butcher, a baker, or glove maker, you were destined to follow his trade.  Calvin looked at the social injustice around him and concluded that not God, but human beings had constructed the social order. He encouraged people to find their vocations by discovering their talents and using them to create new possibilities. With this growth mindset, a glove maker’s son from Stratford found his calling on the London stage as William Shakespeare.

One view of life is dynamic, the other static; one mindset leads to conformity, the other to creative change.  The 18th century gave rise to two views of patriotism: 1. obedience to the status quo or 2. ideals that led to a new form of government, moving from monarchy to democracy, government of the people under a new constitution.

We can also find growth and set mindsets in our work. Recently, when I questioned a longstanding policy, some people at work said “but we’ve always done it that way.” Yet just because we’ve done something for years doesn’t make it right or rule out better alternatives. If our country had followed a set mindset, there would be no progress, no airplanes, electricity, phones, or computers; women couldn’t vote and some people would still be slaves.

Progress—in science, art, politics, and life—flows from a growth mindset.

How can you apply a growth mindset to the year ahead? 

About Writer - Diane Dreher

Diane Dreher is a best-selling author, positive psychology coach, and professor at Santa Clara University. Her latest book is Your Personal Renaissance: 12 Steps to Finding Your Life’s True Calling.

Visit her web site at www.dianedreher.com

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Femi Fani-Kayode - The Bewitching Hour

It is 3 a.m. in the morning: the time that is commonly referred to as the bewitching hour. This is the moment that darkness and silence stalks the land. This is the moment that is pregnant with fear, uncertainty and mystery.

 

This is the moment that evil is undone and that witches return home from their blood-drenched covens. This is the moment that hearts beat fast and that sensitive ears tingle at the slightest sound.

 

Femi Fani-Kayode

 

I love the stillness of this sacred hour. I love the power of the darkest morning and the blackest night. I love that bewitching moment when darkness gives way to light.  It banishes inhibitions and it kindles passion. 

It heightens sensitivity and it excites the human spirit. It purifies the inner man and it sharpens the inner voice. It brings communion with God and it strengthens the soul. It stirs creativity and it brings peace. 

 

O that that peace would last and that that beautiful stillness and silence would persist. It brings strength, empowerment and clarity of thought and vision. 

 

It brings insight, a refreshing and it makes all things beautiful. It soothes troubled souls and it brings joy to broken hearts. It kindles love and it invokes unimaginable pleasures and secret desires.

 

It is at such times that the most crucial decisions can safely be made. It is in such moments that we can worship  our God with passion and reckless abandon. It is at that time that monsters run, that demons flee and that angels dance. 

 

It is at that moment that the Spirit of the Lord  raises His standard and stems the flood. It is at that time that Gods redemptive power brings hope and restoration. It is at that moment that He raises His banner of power and love.

 

It is at that time that silence whispers and that we hear Him clearly. I love the stillness of this sacred hour. I love the power of the darkest morning and the blackest night. I love that bewitching moment when darkness gives way to light.

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Uju Chukwu: Your Mind is a Power Tool

The thoughts in your head are a reflection of what your mouth says. How powerful can our thoughts be? Very very powerful. Has it ever happened that you thought of something, without having the intention of seeing it happen and the next minute you see it happen? Sometimes it might not be as fast as a minute; you might have gone for hours and the next thing you see, it happens. Most times, people even mistake it for a dejavu, but then it is just your thoughts.

So if your thoughts can be this powerful, what then are we supposed to do? It’s pretty simple, guard them right.

We need to think positive at all times. How does that work? It is a conscious effort. I will list 2 major points of the conscious effort we have to make:

By minding the things you let get into your head: Everybody has something to say, (the good, the bad, the ugly and the worse) but not everything everyone has to say is for you. You do not necessarily have to open up your mind to digest everything or every word that passes because some are for you and some are for others. Sometimes you intentionally avoid being in the conversation.

I read a billboard one day and I noticed that the pastor of my church was going to visit a different church. I had been to that church and I did not really like it there, and then I saw that the pastor of my church was going there. A few of my friends said, “now you have to be there because your pastor is there” I replied, “I would not be there because my pastor is going to be there. That which I do not like about the church might just automatically get at me even when my pastor is speaking. So to avoid myself the power of negative thoughts I chose to avoid going because the program he is going to attend will be for him to speak the word for someone in that congregation and definitely not for me.”

There was nothing was obviously stopping me, but was it going to be my word? Not so sure of that.
So it is a conscious effort for us to mind the things we allow to get into our head. Sometimes, you play deaf or better still avoid it completely.

Mind the things we see: The things we look at or study affect how we think and automatically affect how we speak. Our minds get to store images faster than even words. Just like a child, the ability of an image to affect our thought is about 75%. However, what differentiates an adult from a child is the ability of owning up and deciding not to look in that direction – unlike a child where you have to help them watch what they see. Not every book, article or pictures is for our consumption; most times we need to take in things that enlighten us and energize us to move on. Imagine having to watch the news every day and you keep seeing people dying in various countries, the ability for you not to live in fear will be very low.

I actually lost the love for travelling after hearing consecutively on the news the number of plane crashes reported. But does that mean that people do not fly and land safely? The image I have seen and that which I have heard, I let it sink in. Now I try to avoid the TV as much as I can.
If you think of a big future, why not live in that light and look for images that portray same. Rather than watch the TV, I would rather go on YouTube and watch Awesomeness fest. It is an image I am seeing but a different one.

How do we effectively work on our mind?

We should constantly apply the rule of meditation. Learn to meditate. It is the best form of clearing our minds and our thoughts. Maybe you have let in the wrong things; with effective meditation, you have the ability to sieve your thoughts.

Think before you speak, not the other way round. Think first put your words together and then let them out. Consider if the words you speak will make or mar you. Will they make people see you as someone else and will your words make a difference in the lives of those around you in a positive way or cause destruction? These are factors we need to consider.

Learn to put your thoughts first before your words.

Are you willing to take action today? Are you willing to take control of your thoughts, mind what you see and things you hear?

Leave your comments below on how your mind has helped or improved you as a person or your speech to others.

About The Writer - Uju Chukwu

I am obsessed with success, I am a motivational writer, a business speaker and a white collar job lady(YES!!9-5 hustles).  I help individuals and businesses to be more productive, less stressed and happier through the application of humor at work and everyday life. Read my motivational articles on Life's Treasury.

Photo Credit -  Dreamstime | Hugo Felix

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Reasons Why You Should Eat More Fruits

 One of the main purpose of feeding is good health as what we eat reflect how strong and fit we will be. Aside from fruits being delicious and eye catching, it is also extremely medicinal and important for ones health either after meal or on a casual basis.

The consumption of fruit is always highly recommended by nutritionists and doctors especially for individuals that are just recovering from illness because it is a dependable source of vitamins and minerals. It is important to munch on  fruits as often as possible and Jovago.com, Africa’s No 1 hotel booking portal shares reasons why.

Immunity

The main function that the immune system performs is to protect the body from disease and keep it healthy. If this is weak, then you may be prone to infections. Hence, to shield the body from you have to take fruit which will provide the body with Vitamins C and E which will help combat infections. Without a proper immune system which fruits helps to maintain, death, weakness, sickness and several other illness tend to be opened to us.

Fastens Digestion

Eating fruit after a meal help fasten or enhance digestion. However, ensure that you do not eat the fruit immediately after the meal. You should leave at least 30 minutes between when you finished eating and when you consume the fruit. Some of the fruit that serve this purpose include bananas, avocados and apple. Also eating such fruits in large quantity doesn't make it work better, a certain amount of fruit can perform its function and give you a safe digestion.

Fruits

Strong teeth and bones

The mix of fruit and balance diet can help you develop strong teeth and bones. This is because many fruits contained vitamins C, iron and calcium which are catalyst for developing strong teeth and bones. This is more like a protection against toothache and other harmful diseases that happens to our teeth and bones.

Achieve a Healthy Weight

If you are a weight conscious person, one way to check it is by eating fruit regularly. This achieved when the fruit breaks down carbs and fibres in order to encourage easy digestion. Interestingly, all fruit contain fibre.

Improves Eye sight

If you want to protect your eyes against eyesight diseases, then your sure stake is fruit. Some fruit that can aid good vision includes maize, strawberries, carrot, and tomatoes which can be purchased in shops close to the Four Points, Lagos.

Guard against heart disease

The consumption of fruit guard against heart disease as well as reducing blood pressure to a very large extent. Take fruits like avocado and almonds to boost your heart resistance.

Till now most scientists still believe that the reason why the old age lived longer than this new generation is because of the adequate feeding on fruits which protected them from death causing illness in the likes of heart Disease, eye blindness, cancer and many others.

A list of Fruits and Functions

So one way to live longer on earth and prevent regular illnesses is to feed on both food and fruits, making an adequate balance diet.

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Top Reasons Why Most Girls Dislikes Condom

Sexual Infections

Although condoms are prescribed to reduce the spread of infections. Ironically, the latex allergies which are the strongest deterrent against Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs) cause women to end up with yeast infections and others. Yeast infection simply means that too many yeast cells are growing in the woman’s “private part.” It is very common but don’t let it bother you too much because it can be easily treated.

No Children (Birth)

Some ladies do everything they can to avoid their partner using condoms. This is because they want children. They feel the best way to totally own a man is to be pregnant for him. However, they seduce their man to sleep with them without using a condom as such, they ‘hook’ the man when pregnancy surfaces.

Condom Breaks

It is better not to use a condom at all if it will end up breaking. Sometimes, while the heat is on and there is a high level of friction, a condom could break thereby exposing the woman to all dangers associated with casual sex. So, some women feel ‘why the need’ and prefer to be raw with their man.

It Reduces Sex Pleasure

In fact men mostly complain that the use of condoms do not enable them get maximum sensation. Women are also not left out. condoms reduce the level and passion one could have during intimacy. This is a major reason some women hate condoms. Who wanna have sex without pleasure?haven't seen any.

Smell Of The Latex

Some women have attributed the smell of condoms to that of a balloon. condom latex has a particular odious smell. Lots of users (male and female) have complained about this. As a result, these days, condoms are made in different flavours (banana, apple, strawberry, peach, etc).

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Prisoner Of Uncertainty by Tolu Falode

Tolu Falode a freelance blogger who writes for Bella Naija and also runs her own blog The Flame of Faith drops a new article which reflects the Nigerian society in terms of Lifestyle and standard of Living. Her article Prisoner of Uncertainty talks more about poverty, suffering and various activities striking the average Nigerian in the street.

Read Full Article bellow and refer to The Flame of Faith for more stories that touch by Tolu Falode.

 

 

Stories upon stories upon stories are told of how laughter is birthed through a grave of defeat-of how songs spring forth from a well of misery. But some people struggle with this revelation of another’s destiny. Some people find it hard to believe-could that truly happen to me? They whisper these thoughts uncertainly.

 

I understand that small voice-I have spoken with it before. It sits and wonders and then turns around and faces you with fears made in monstrous contours-of possibilities that cannot exist, of paths that you probably should not cross because they hold traps of treacherous gutters that hold sewers of defeat. But listen to me: there is more to you than you presently see-yes, there is more to your destiny.

 

I need you to understand-as a woman that has faced the fear of tragedy, as one that has stared into the eyes of death’s hungry painful gaze of lost promises-there is more than you can presently see.

Your path has not wounded here to defeat your previous laughter and determined instincts.

I know it hurts, whether it be death to relationships, friendships or even more-yes, the pain is very sore. I can understand that feeling quite well so listen to someone who has been there before.

You have more to offer than you could possibly imagine. There is a pathway before you-that only you have the key to unlock the treasure it holds. There is a secret within you that only your mouth can speak because only your ears have been gifted with the sound of its melody.

 

How do I hear it ,you may ask me? Well, it sounds a bit like your destiny but it carries the pain of past experiences tendered softly into the sweet sorrowful sounds of a happy melody but at the same time it is weighed heavily with the bitter taste of regret but still manages to produce a heavy projection of prospects. This is the beautiful sound it makes; this is the form in which it enables you to create: dreams, and visions into realities.

 

This is how it sounds-its mingled with a tingle of all your past sounds. Mixed up in a jingle of fears, faith and a feisty determination to face the future. That is the joyous sound it makes in your ears-if only you would stop staring at regret and fearing the many doors you now look into as possible paths for future endeavors.

 

Take this moment-to listen to the voice of your heart. Converse with your soul and see what thoughts it has to share with your words-watch how it changes your perspective into a more powerful form.

You see, what happens with people unfortunately is they fall into this dangerous tunnel of defeat and they get lost in the echo it produces as they sink suddenly unto their knees. They pay so much attention to that one powerful wound-you know the sore-the bruise life gives us to hurt our present mood; the sore that changes the landscape of your view. The one that speaks of so much regret and pain and resurrects the past filled with dead promises, a gaze into memory’s face.

 

Yes that sore is the one I speak of-that deep wound has the power to hold one hostage for so long in that deep pit of pain. And they seem to forget-people cross this bridge to meet their destiny again. Its like all life’s forces conspire to push you towards the right path and in that determination to make you face your future task, a mistake is made in the form of regrets and losses and faded faces and this is where the ditch of doubt is twisted into a lifetime of regret and riddled with the disease of past debts.

People fail to leave that ditch behind-they do not notice the rope that dangles softly to the side. You know the rope; right

 

The one that hangs loosely in the dark beside that ditch you have sunk into-that hole in your heart-there is a rope of hope that moves so softly-like a breeze-a lot of people perceive its presence but not many see-you see, because they have been blinded by defeat.

 

It dangles so softly-and it has enormous power in the swish it makes as it swings from one side to another-silently it calls for your hands to make haste. I encourage you take it-you know, those moments when hope speaks that all is not lost, keep holding on, you will come out of this deep defeat. I need you to hold that rope, and use it to push ahead-hold it for dear life-literally it is the only way out of your present fear of death-death to your dreams, your stories, and even your destiny.

 

Hold that rope of hope and use it to push forward and you will come out and face the path ahead. Because the magical thing about that rope is when you hold it close, it speaks to your heart and heals the wounds of a dangerous sore and it makes it a strong scar.

It will be a scar from which you speak to people about how to move forward in their dreams because once you join forces with the hands of destiny, you are no longer a prisoner of defeat, you are no longer bound to the well of uncertainty. So hold that rope, please-step out of your present misery-so your purpose may finally be given the breathe it needs to speak.

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My Advice To Married Couples By Gerald Rogers

Obviously, I’m not a relationship expert. But there’s something about my divorce being finalized this week that gives me perspective of things I wish I would have done different… After losing a woman that I loved, and a marriage of almost 16 years, here’s the advice I wish I would have had

1. Never stop courting.

Never stop dating. Never ever take that woman for granted. When you asked her to marry you, you promised to be that man that would own her hear and to fiercely protect it. This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. She choose you. Never forget that, and never get lazy in your love.

2. Protect your own heart. 

Just as you committed to being the protector of her heart, you must guard your own with the same vigilance. Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except for your wife. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there.

3. Fall in love over and over again. 

 You will constantly change. You’re not the same people you were when you got married, and in five years you will not be the same person you are today. Change will come, and in that you have to re-choose each other everyday. She doesn't have to stay with you, and if you don’t take care of her heart, she may give that heart to someone else or seal you out completely, and you may never be able to get it back. Always fight to win her love just as you did when you were courting her.

4. Always see the best in her. 

 Focus only on what you love. What you focus on will expand. If you focus on what bugs you, all you will see is reasons to be bugged. If you focus on what you love, you can’t help but be consumed by love. Focus to the point where you can no longer see anything but love, and you know without a doubt that you are the luckiest man on earth to be have this woman as your wife.

5. It’s not your job to change or fix her… 

Your job is to love her as she is with no expectation of her ever changing. And if she changes, love what she becomes, whether it’s what you wanted or not.

6. Take full accountability for your own emotions: 

It’s not your wife’s job to make you happy, and she can't make you sad. You are responsible for finding your own happiness, and through that your joy will spill over into your relationship and your love.

7. Never blame your wife if you get frustrated or angry at her: 

it is only because it is triggering something inside of you. They are your emotions, and your responsibility. When you feel those feelings take time to get present and to look within and understand what it is inside of you that is asking to be healed. You were attracted to this woman because she was the person best suited to trigger all of your childhood wounds in the most painful way so that you could heal them… when you heal yourself, you will no longer be triggered by her, and you will wonder why you ever were.

8. Allow your woman to just be:

When she’s sad or upset, it’s not your job to fix it, it’s your job to hold her and let her know it’s OK. Let her know that you hear her, and that she’s important and that you are that pillar on which she can always lean. The feminine spirit is about change and emotion and like a storm her emotions will roll in and out, and as you remain strong and unjudging she will trust you and open her soul to you… Don't run away when she is upset. Stand present and strong and let her know you aren’t going anywhere. Listen to what she is really saying behind the words and emotion.

9. Be silly… 

Don’t take yourself so damn seriously. Laugh. And make her laugh. Laughter makes everything else easier.

10. Fill her soul everyday

Learn her love languages and the specific ways that she feels important and validated and Cherished. Ask her to create a list of 10 things that make her feel loved and memorize those things and make it a priority everyday to make her feel like a queen.

11. Be present. 

Give her not only your time, but your focus, your attention and your soul. Do whatever it takes to clear your head so that when you are with her you are fully with her. Treat her as you would your most valuable client. She is.

12. Be willing to take her sexually:

To carry her away in the power of your masculine presence, to consume her and devour her with your strength, and to penetrate her to the deepest levels of her soul. Let her melt into her feminine softness as she knows she can trust you fully.

13. Don’t be an idiot

And don’t be afraid of being one either. You will make mistakes and so will she. Try not to make too big of mistakes, and learn from the ones you do make. You’re not supposed to be perfect, just try to not be too stupid.

14. Give her space

The woman is so good at giving and giving, and sometimes she will need to be reminded to take time to nurture herself. Sometimes she will need to fly from your branches to go and find what feeds her soul, and if you give her that space she will come back with new songs to sing…. (okay, getting a little too poetic here, but you get the point. Tell her to take time for herself, especially after you have kids. She needs that space to renew and get re-centered, and to find herself after she gets lost in serving you, the kids and the world.)

15. Be vulnerable

You don’t have to have it all together. Be willing to share your fears and feelings, and quick to acknowledge your mistakes.

16. Be fully transparent. 

If you want to have trust you must be willing to share everything… Especially those things you don’t want to share. It takes courage to fully love, to fully open your heart and let her in when you don’t know i she will like what she finds… Part of that courage is allowing her to love you completely, your darkness as well as your light. Drop the mask… If you feel like you need to wear a mask around her, and show up perfect all the time, you will never experience the full dimension of what love can be.

17. Never stop growing together

The stagnant pond breeds malaria, the flowing stream is always fresh and cool. Atrophy is the natural process when you stop working a muscle, just as it is if you stop working on your relationship. Find common goals, dreams and visions to work towards.

18. Don’t worry about money. 

Money is a game, find ways to work together as a team to win it. It never helps when teammates fight. Figure out ways to leverage both persons strength to win.

19. Forgive immediately and focus on the future rather than carrying weight from the past. Don’t let your history hold you hostage. Holding onto past mistakes that either you or she makes, is like a heavy anchor to your marriage and will hold you back. Forgiveness is Freedom. Cut the anchor loose and always choose love.

20. Always choose love. 

In the end, this is the only advice you need. If this is the guiding principle through which all your choices is governed, there is nothing that will threaten the happiness of your marriage. Love will always endure.

In the end marriage isn’t about happily ever after. It’s about work. And a commitment to grow together and a willingness to continually invest in creating something that can endure eternity. Through that work, the happiness will come. Marriage is life, and it will bring ups and downs. Embracing all of the cycles and learning to learn from and love each experience will bring the strength and perspective to keep building, one brick at a time. These are lessons I learned the hard way.

These are lessons I learned too late. But these are lessons I am learning and committed in carrying forward. Truth is, I loved being married, and in time, I will get married again, and when I do, I will build it with a foundation that will endure any storm and any amount of time. If you are reading this and find wisdom in my pain, share it those those young husbands whose hearts are still full of hope, and with those couples you may know who may have forgotten how to love.

One of those men may be like I was, and in these hard earned lessons perhaps something will awaken in him and he will learn to be the man his lady has been waiting for. Men, this is your charge: Commit to being an Epic lover. There is no greater challenge, and no greater prize. Your woman deserves that from you. Be the type of husband your wife can’t help but brag about.


References to My Advice to Married Couples After Divorcing My Wife Of 16 Years by Gerald Rogers

Source: more.ng/relationships/my-advice-to-married-couples-after-divorcing-my-wife-of-16-years-by-gerald-rogers | Visit http://more.ng/ for more

Obviously, I’m not a relationship expert. But there’s something about my divorce being finalized this week that gives me perspective of things I wish I would have done different… After losing a woman that I loved, and a marriage of almost 16 years, here’s the advice I wish I would have had 1. Never stop courting. Never stop dating. NEVER EVER take that woman for granted. When you asked her to marry you, you promised to be that man that would OWN HER HEART and to fiercely protect it. This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. SHE CHOSE YOU. Never forget that, and NEVER GET LAZY in your love. 2. Protect your own heart. Just as you committed to being the protector of her heart, you must guard your own with the same vigilance. Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except for your wife. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there. 3. Fall in love over and over again. You will constantly change. You’re not the same people you were when you got married, and in five years you will not be the same person you are today. Change will come, and in that you have to re-choose each other everyday. SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO STAY WITH YOU, and if you don’t take care of her heart, she may give that heart to someone else or seal you out completely, and you may never be able to get it back. Always fight to win her love just as you did when you were courting her. 4. Always see the best in her. Focus only on what you love. What you focus on will expand. If you focus on what bugs you, all you will see is reasons to be bugged. If you focus on what you love, you can’t help but be consumed by love. Focus to the point where you can no longer see anything but love, and you know without a doubt that you are the luckiest man on earth to be have this woman as your wife. 5. It’s not your job to change or fix her… your job is to love her as she is with no expectation of her ever changing. And if she changes, love what she becomes, whether it’s what you wanted or not. 6. Take full accountability for your own emotions: It’s not your wife’s job to make you happy, and she CAN’T make you sad. You are responsible for finding your own happiness, and through that your joy will spill over into your relationship and your love. 7. Never blame your wife if you get frustrated or angry at her, it is only because it is triggering something inside of YOU. They are YOUR emotions, and your responsibility. When you feel those feelings take time to get present and to look within and understand what it is inside of YOU that is asking to be healed. You were attracted to this woman because she was the person best suited to trigger all of your childhood wounds in the most painful way so that you could heal them… when you heal yourself, you will no longer be triggered by her, and you will wonder why you ever were. 8. Allow your woman to just be. When she’s sad or upset, it’s not your job to fix it, it’s your job to HOLD HER and let her know it’s ok. Let her know that you hear her, and that she’s important and that you are that pillar on which she can always lean. The feminine spirit is about change and emotion and like a storm her emotions will roll in and out, and as you remain strong and unjudging she will trust you and open her soul to you… DON’T RUN-AWAY WHEN SHE’S UPSET. Stand present and strong and let her know you aren’t going anywhere. Listen to what she is really saying behind the words and emotion. 9. Be silly… don’t take yourself so damn seriously. Laugh. And make her laugh. Laughter makes everything else easier. 10. Fill her soul everyday… learn her love languages and the specific ways that she feels important and validated and CHERISHED. Ask her to create a list of 10 THINGS that make her feel loved and memorize those things and make it a priority everyday to make her feel like a queen. 11. Be present. Give her not only your time, but your focus, your attention and your soul. Do whatever it takes to clear your head so that when you are with her you are fully WITH HER. Treat her as you would your most valuable client. She is. 12. Be willing to take her sexually, to carry her away in the power of your masculine presence, to consume her and devour her with your strength, and to penetrate her to the deepest levels of her soul. Let her melt into her feminine softness as she knows she can trust you fully. 13. Don’t be an idiot…. And don’t be afraid of being one either. You will make mistakes and so will she. Try not to make too big of mistakes, and learn from the ones you do make. You’re not supposed to be perfect, just try to not be too stupid. 14. Give her space… The woman is so good at giving and giving, and sometimes she will need to be reminded to take time to nurture herself. Sometimes she will need to fly from your branches to go and find what feeds her soul, and if you give her that space she will come back with new songs to sing…. (okay, getting a little too poetic here, but you get the point. Tell her to take time for herself, ESPECIALLY after you have kids. She needs that space to renew and get re-centered, and to find herself after she gets lost in serving you, the kids and the world.) 15. Be vulnerable… you don’t have to have it all together. Be willing to share your fears and feelings, and quick to acknowledge your mistakes. 16. Be fully transparent. If you want to have trust you must be willing to share EVERYTHING… Especially those things you don’t want to share. It takes courage to fully love, to fully open your heart and let her in when you don’t know i she will like what she finds… Part of that courage is allowing her to love you completely, your darkness as well as your light. DROP THE MASK… If you feel like you need to wear a mask around her, and show up perfect all the time, you will never experience the full dimension of what love can be. 17. Never stop growing together… The stagnant pond breeds malaria, the flowing stream is always fresh and cool. Atrophy is the natural process when you stop working a muscle, just as it is if you stop working on your relationship. Find common goals, dreams and visions to work towards. 18. Don’t worry about money. Money is a game, find ways to work together as a team to win it. It never helps when teammates fight. Figure out ways to leverage both persons strength to win. 19. Forgive immediately and focus on the future rather than carrying weight from the past. Don’t let your history hold you hostage. Holding onto past mistakes that either you or she makes, is like a heavy anchor to your marriage and will hold you back. FORGIVENESS IS FREEDOM. Cut the anchor loose and always choose love. 20. Always choose love. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. In the end, this is the only advice you need. If this is the guiding principle through which all your choices is governed, there is nothing that will threaten the happiness of your marriage. Love will always endure. SEE ALSO: 10 Truths You Were Never Told About Marriage In the end marriage isn’t about happily ever after. It’s about work. And a commitment to grow together and a willingness to continually invest in creating something that can endure eternity. Through that work, the happiness will come. Marriage is life, and it will bring ups and downs. Embracing all of the cycles and learning to learn from and love each experience will bring the strength and perspective to keep building, one brick at a time. These are lessons I learned the hard way. These are lessons I learned too late. But these are lessons I am learning and committed in carrying forward. Truth is, I loved being married, and in time, I will get married again, and when I do, I will build it with a foundation that will endure any storm and any amount of time. If you are reading this and find wisdom in my pain, share it those those young husbands whose hearts are still full of hope, and with those couples you may know who may have forgotten how to love. One of those men may be like I was, and in these hard earned lessons perhaps something will awaken in him and he will learn to be the man his lady has been waiting for. MEN, THIS IS YOUR CHARGE: Commit to being an EPIC LOVER. There is no greater challenge, and no greater prize. Your woman deserves that from you. Be the type of husband your wife can’t help but brag about....

Source: more.ng/relationships/my-advice-to-married-couples-after-divorcing-my-wife-of-16-years-by-gerald-rogers | Visit http://more.ng/ for more

Obviously, I’m not a relationship expert. But there’s something about my divorce being finalized this week that gives me perspective of things I wish I would have done different… After losing a woman that I loved, and a marriage of almost 16 years, here’s the advice I wish I would have had 1. Never stop courting. Never stop dating. NEVER EVER take that woman for granted. When you asked her to marry you, you promised to be that man that would OWN HER HEART and to fiercely protect it. This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. SHE CHOSE YOU. Never forget that, and NEVER GET LAZY in your love. 2. Protect your own heart. Just as you committed to being the protector of her heart, you must guard your own with the same vigilance. Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except for your wife. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there. 3. Fall in love over and over again. You will constantly change. You’re not the same people you were when you got married, and in five years you will not be the same person you are today. Change will come, and in that you have to re-choose each other everyday. SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO STAY WITH YOU, and if you don’t take care of her heart, she may give that heart to someone else or seal you out completely, and you may never be able to get it back. Always fight to win her love just as you did when you were courting her. 4. Always see the best in her. Focus only on what you love. What you focus on will expand. If you focus on what bugs you, all you will see is reasons to be bugged. If you focus on what you love, you can’t help but be consumed by love. Focus to the point where you can no longer see anything but love, and you know without a doubt that you are the luckiest man on earth to be have this woman as your wife. 5. It’s not your job to change or fix her… your job is to love her as she is with no expectation of her ever changing. And if she changes, love what she becomes, whether it’s what you wanted or not. 6. Take full accountability for your own emotions: It’s not your wife’s job to make you happy, and she CAN’T make you sad. You are responsible for finding your own happiness, and through that your joy will spill over into your relationship and your love. 7. Never blame your wife if you get frustrated or angry at her, it is only because it is triggering something inside of YOU. They are YOUR emotions, and your responsibility. When you feel those feelings take time to get present and to look within and understand what it is inside of YOU that is asking to be healed. You were attracted to this woman because she was the person best suited to trigger all of your childhood wounds in the most painful way so that you could heal them… when you heal yourself, you will no longer be triggered by her, and you will wonder why you ever were. 8. Allow your woman to just be. When she’s sad or upset, it’s not your job to fix it, it’s your job to HOLD HER and let her know it’s ok. Let her know that you hear her, and that she’s important and that you are that pillar on which she can always lean. The feminine spirit is about change and emotion and like a storm her emotions will roll in and out, and as you remain strong and unjudging she will trust you and open her soul to you… DON’T RUN-AWAY WHEN SHE’S UPSET. Stand present and strong and let her know you aren’t going anywhere. Listen to what she is really saying behind the words and emotion. 9. Be silly… don’t take yourself so damn seriously. Laugh. And make her laugh. Laughter makes everything else easier. 10. Fill her soul everyday… learn her love languages and the specific ways that she feels important and validated and CHERISHED. Ask her to create a list of 10 THINGS that make her feel loved and memorize those things and make it a priority everyday to make her feel like a queen. 11. Be present. Give her not only your time, but your focus, your attention and your soul. Do whatever it takes to clear your head so that when you are with her you are fully WITH HER. Treat her as you would your most valuable client. She is. 12. Be willing to take her sexually, to carry her away in the power of your masculine presence, to consume her and devour her with your strength, and to penetrate her to the deepest levels of her soul. Let her melt into her feminine softness as she knows she can trust you fully. 13. Don’t be an idiot…. And don’t be afraid of being one either. You will make mistakes and so will she. Try not to make too big of mistakes, and learn from the ones you do make. You’re not supposed to be perfect, just try to not be too stupid. 14. Give her space… The woman is so good at giving and giving, and sometimes she will need to be reminded to take time to nurture herself. Sometimes she will need to fly from your branches to go and find what feeds her soul, and if you give her that space she will come back with new songs to sing…. (okay, getting a little too poetic here, but you get the point. Tell her to take time for herself, ESPECIALLY after you have kids. She needs that space to renew and get re-centered, and to find herself after she gets lost in serving you, the kids and the world.) 15. Be vulnerable… you don’t have to have it all together. Be willing to share your fears and feelings, and quick to acknowledge your mistakes. 16. Be fully transparent. If you want to have trust you must be willing to share EVERYTHING… Especially those things you don’t want to share. It takes courage to fully love, to fully open your heart and let her in when you don’t know i she will like what she finds… Part of that courage is allowing her to love you completely, your darkness as well as your light. DROP THE MASK… If you feel like you need to wear a mask around her, and show up perfect all the time, you will never experience the full dimension of what love can be. 17. Never stop growing together… The stagnant pond breeds malaria, the flowing stream is always fresh and cool. Atrophy is the natural process when you stop working a muscle, just as it is if you stop working on your relationship. Find common goals, dreams and visions to work towards. 18. Don’t worry about money. Money is a game, find ways to work together as a team to win it. It never helps when teammates fight. Figure out ways to leverage both persons strength to win. 19. Forgive immediately and focus on the future rather than carrying weight from the past. Don’t let your history hold you hostage. Holding onto past mistakes that either you or she makes, is like a heavy anchor to your marriage and will hold you back. FORGIVENESS IS FREEDOM. Cut the anchor loose and always choose love. 20. Always choose love. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. In the end, this is the only advice you need. If this is the guiding principle through which all your choices is governed, there is nothing that will threaten the happiness of your marriage. Love will always endure. SEE ALSO: 10 Truths You Were Never Told About Marriage In the end marriage isn’t about happily ever after. It’s about work. And a commitment to grow together and a willingness to continually invest in creating something that can endure eternity. Through that work, the happiness will come. Marriage is life, and it will bring ups and downs. Embracing all of the cycles and learning to learn from and love each experience will bring the strength and perspective to keep building, one brick at a time. These are lessons I learned the hard way. These are lessons I learned too late. But these are lessons I am learning and committed in carrying forward. Truth is, I loved being married, and in time, I will get married again, and when I do, I will build it with a foundation that will endure any storm and any amount of time. If you are reading this and find wisdom in my pain, share it those those young husbands whose hearts are still full of hope, and with those couples you may know who may have forgotten how to love. One of those men may be like I was, and in these hard earned lessons perhaps something will awaken in him and he will learn to be the man his lady has been waiting for. MEN, THIS IS YOUR CHARGE: Commit to being an EPIC LOVER. There is no greater challenge, and no greater prize. Your woman deserves that from you. Be the type of husband your wife can’t help but brag about....

Source: more.ng/relationships/my-advice-to-married-couples-after-divorcing-my-wife-of-16-years-by-gerald-rogers | Visit http://more.ng/ for more

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Linda Ikeji Might Just Be Nigeria's Richest Blogger

Blogging has long driven a path to success as most Nigerians tend to make millions yearly from the blogging niche. Such bloggers include the likes of Linda Ikeji, Bella Niaja and Ogbonge blog but among all i seem to find interest in Linda Ikeji who has been feeding Instagram with lot of photos from her mansion down to her stylish living  and yes her wardrobe exclusively pilled up with designers shoes and Clothes.

Linda Ikeji is a 35 year-old Nigerian blogger, Model, Writer and entrepreneur who has over the years made lot of money from her blog, which is best known as a controversial and media contributor to the Nigerian Entertainment industry. She was born and brought up in a Catholic Family in Imo state with other siblings including Benita Ikeji, Vera Ikeji Shilobod, Laura Ikeji, Edna Ikeji and Sandra Ikeji.

Linda Ikeji's Blog started in 2006 after she graduated from English in the University of Lagos. Also a brief story was once published on her blog on how she was arrested due to she being unable to pay back what she borrowed from a bank. There she also spoke on how she started a Magazine and printed about four Collections before she finally pack her backs and entered the Blogging Niche.

She has won lots of awards since she started blogging including Best Entertainment blog and Nigeria Blog Awards NBA. No wonder her account is running over with lot of cash. Though i couldn't get the average total number of page views she receives a day and her alexa ranking she seem to be one of Nigeria's biggest bloggers if not the biggest.

Most of her yearly income seem to be coming from advertisement programs managed on her blog and lot of Nigerian based and foreign companies seem to be patriotic to her. I have seen the likes of Glo and others place banners on her blog. Wonder if she is an ambassador to any company.

Being rich i think is now part of her. Her fashion, style and clothing is top class, her house and standard of living still a top class i wonder when she is going to be talking marriage issues again. Though her first marriage sadly fell apart but that doesn't stop her wealth and fame.

Much said about one of my blogging celebrity model blessed with creative and trouble making talents which to me is a call to wealth. Lets see what she has been doing lately on Instagram.

After the above collection personally uploaded to Instagram by Linda Ikeji, She tend to be one of Nigeria's Richest and lavishly living bloggers. Everything in the photos above are owned and maintained by Linda who has made a living out of blogging. Her elegant fashion and style will soon get a showcase segment in the Fashion and style category on Ohen's Crib so watch out for "Linda Ikeji's Fashion with Prince J".

I guess the Entertainment industry's money is not only for the Musicians and Actors. Its for the bloggers too who are busy gossiping and sharing.

Blog Address: www.lindaikejisblog.com

Instagram: www.instagram.com/officiallindaikeji

Twitter: www.twitter.com/lindaikeji

You can also read more about her on Wikipedia

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